The Blind Man

There once was a little boy named David. At a young age, David developed a disease that caused him to be blind. Having heard all about the difficulties of being blind, David was still determined to be someone special. He worked hard, graduated Columbia University, and went on to be the Lieutenant Governor of New York! Before David could even embrace his accomplishments, he received another gift. The Governor of New York had to step down due to a scandal, which led David to be the Governor of New York! He then promised to improve the ethics in the New York Congress and to cut unnecessary spending. This seems like an amazing story, but what's more amazing is what follows. The New York legislature has recently been flooded with corrupt politicians. Every day we hear of another story, from Eliot Spitzer to Charlie Rangel. New York has been deemed the state of the corrupt. Seeing this taking place, David found it important to continue this trend and help New York continue it's new legacy as having the most corrupt lawmakers in the country. So David Paterson awarded a contract to AEG to put slot machines at the Aqueduct Race Track. AEG was the worst bidder for the contract, and it was blatant that Paterson was not being completely honest about the deal. After that, we discovered that Paterson allegedly (always have to write allegedly) tried to cover up for David Johnson, his aid who choked his girlfriend. Paterson, you are an inspiration to us all. I hope to continue the New York legacy when I grow up.

Canada, Ay?

First off, I'd like to say welcome back to the four readers I have. After a long break I've decided to put my senior year to some good use and continue this blog. What more fun can I have than posting my opinions on the internet just so they can be held against me in the future? Anyways, this article isn't about how bored I am in senior year, but about a topic even fewer people care about: the Olympics. Like most Americans, I feel a strong sense of unity and nationalism when I watch Evan Lysacek (can't believe I spelled that right) defeat that commy Plushenko (sorry, got carried away there). We all felt a punch in our stomach when Canada took away our hopes of an upset in that classic hockey game. In the end, however, America, as usual, ended up with the most medals. It feels good to be an American. But in the end, most of us are not going to feel all gloomy watching the closing ceremonies. We probably won't even notice that it's over. It's the Winter Olympics, and we just don't love it all that much. I was waiting for it to end so I can watch my NBC series' again (yes, some people do watch NBC that's not Law & Order). Either way, as entertaining as the Olympics was, two weeks was about enough for me. Thank you Lindsey Vonn, Apolo Ohno, and Shaun White for the medals and the entertainment, but we've had enough for four years. 

They Don't Deserve The Title.

"Living someone else's life is more difficult than living your own."

  It kills me when I go on Wikipedia and I see Dane Cook listed as a comedian and film actor. He is an amazing comedian, but an extremely sub-par actor. I hate the favoritism people attain because they have a special talent. Dane Cook, you're hilarious, but don't ruin your reputation by acting in weak films. He does not add any depth in any movies that he has done (Employee of the Month, Good Luck Chuck...). And let me bring in his costar in Employee of the Month, Jessica Simpson. Jessica, you know you have no acting skills whatsoever, so please go back to, umm, was it singing?

Many movies lately have recruited beauty over talent. For some movies, however, it's not that bad.

   Megan Fox, you can star in as many films as you like. But your title should be model, not actress. I can't really judge your acting, because you haven't really done any. In the Transformer movies and How To Lose Friends and Alienate People, you boosted the audience just by looking good. If not for you Transformers 2 would have bombed. But, in all your movies, you don't do much, which leads me to the conclusion you are not very good at acting. If you were, maybe they would have given you a line in the movie.

   Another beautiful actor that can't really perform is Adrian Grenier (Vince from Entourage). Don't get me wrong, I do think Entourage is fantastic, and I enjoy watching Vince and the boys partying. But when they try to bring Entourage to the dramatic episodes, Vince still manages to keep the show humorous. Last season, when Vince couldn't find a job, the show seemed to get serious. However, like my friend said, he laughed whenever Vince screamed. Entourage should stick to the fun life, we all enjoy it that way.

-Some actors that are surprisingly good: Miley Cyrus and Justin Timberlake.

-More actors to be added later.

The Flavors.

My first theory goes like this: If you ask a hundred people if they like Cookie Dough ice cream, ninety nine of them will say yes. It's just so hard to find someone that doesn't like it. I don't know how they do it, but it's just unbelievable. On my next topic, Root Beer is either loved or disliked. No one just likes Root Beer, they love it. I'm a devout Root Beer fan, and anything with that flavor (ices, lollipop, etc.) I will get excited. My next thought is that frozen ices are disastrous in comparison to fresh ices. When you eat frozen ices, you constantly have to take those awkward bites that make you look like a retard because you don't want to get teeth freeze. They lose their flavor and you end up getting messy. They need to create ices where they don't get hard after being frozen. Anyways, to my next topic, which I'm sure I will have many people who disagree, is the cherry flavor. I hope to make it to Congress in the future just so I can accomplish my one goal: Ban cherry flavors of all kind. I don't understand how anyone can like cherry flavor anything. Although I don't agree with the "it tastes like medicine" idea, I think it is horrible. South Park summed it up when Randy said in response to a cherry Pop Tart, "Eww, cherry." It shouldn't be mixed in with our Jolly Ranchers, our ices, or any other candy. The only cherry anything we should have are cherry coke and real cherries.

Facebook Whores.

It kills me to write about this, being that I have been involved for a little, but the Facebook whoring has got to stop. I am writing this because a friend has requested me to do so, but I agree with him on this manner. Facebook should be used for people to talk to someone who they recently met or for college kids to keep in touch. What it has become is a popularity contest for people who don't really have friends and need to feel good about themselves by being friends with everyone possible. Or, it could be for girls who put their profile picture up just so they can receive comments like "omg so pretty" even though half the times you want to tell them to be honest for once in their life. Or, it has become a place where people feel the need to share their every day activity with us. I'm sorry but we don't need to know that you're hungry or is bored at work (I got those ideas from checking my homepage; these statuses are real.) Of course commenting here and there on someone's wall that they miss them or to comment on a picture of a party that they went to is acceptable, but to a certain extent. I don't want to on my homepage people leaving videos on someone's wall saying that "they should hang out cuz I miss you. K bye." Stop ruining social networking. I'm not saying that any of us have anything to do in life, but at least don't waste it on complete bull shit. You're not special if someone comments on your status or if you have over a thousand friends. I have so much more to write about this, but it's long enough as it is. The whoring has got to stop! (Unless you're hot and put up pictures or you constantly write funny statuses)

Federer V. Roddick

Even for the people who don't like tennis, you have to admit that game was better than any NBA Finals or World Series game (I'll leave out the Super Bowl). It was tough to even decide who to root for. The American or the Greatest. Do you want to witness history or do you want to have that patriotic feel good attitude. As the thirty game fifth set was going on, I didn't know what to be thinking. The first thought in my head was why couldn't Federer break Roddick. He's supposedly, and in my opinion, the best player ever and he can't break Roddick, who is known to choke under pressure. But the truth is, you have to hand it to Roddick for holding in there. After seeing his expression after he lost, you felt his pain. He wanted it so badly, but he just couldn't beat the champ. Either way, he deserved that standing ovation after his defeat; he gave us one of the greatest matches ever played.

The Half Turn.

In my opinion, the half turn is credible and should be allowed, depending on the circumstances. The half turn is when someone gives a look back in disgust and contempt, but does not go the full hundred eighty degrees. It is  usually utilized to shut up someone or a group of people are talking in a loud manner. If you're in a movie theater and a bunch of idiots are talking in back of you, then the turn is necessary to keep them quiet. But if there's two people whispering to each other in a boring speech and someone who wants to feel important gives you the patronizing look, then it does not work. When the turn is made, the eyes have to meet and you have to make sure they know they're beat. The turn is tough to master, because you might be laughed at. But if it's used correctly and at the right time, the half turn is a valuable asset.